Aaron Stradecke holds his soon-to-be three-year-old daughter Audrey on his lap as he reflects on the death of his wife and mother of his three children, Mallory Cooper-Stradecke. at the age of 28.

害羞草研究所淚n a way, she [Audrey] is kind of the luckiest of all,害羞草研究所� said Stradecke, his eyes welling up. 害羞草研究所淪he might vaguely remember her mom, but she doesn害羞草研究所檛 have to go through it like the rest of us do.害羞草研究所�

He speaks these words towards the end of an interview in his Saanich townhouse near the University of Victoria.

Stradecke害羞草研究所檚 other children, four-year-old Tristan and his seven-year-old sister Phaedra, have already left for school. The only other person in the house is Stradecke害羞草研究所檚 sister Carol, who has come from Edmonton to help out in any way that she can. This morning she is cleaning the kitchen, with the sound of dishes clanging and banging in the background.

A cartoon plays on low volume on the television in the living room, but Audrey loses interests and eventually asks her dad if they can go to the park. 害羞草研究所淲e害羞草研究所檒l go a little later,害羞草研究所� he says. 害羞草研究所淚t害羞草研究所檚 a nice day for that.害羞草研究所�

It is a Monday morning in the middle of May, one week after Mallory would have turned 29, had it not been for a rare genetic disease called Lynch syndrome. That led to cancer of the stomach, which then spread to her right lung, notwithstanding surgery that removed most of her stomach, some 40 lymph nodes and large portions of esophagus, and several rounds of chemotherapy before and after surgery.

害羞草研究所淚t just kept getting harder and harder for her,害羞草研究所� said Stradecke in describing the course of the final months. 害羞草研究所淓very day it seemed like she was in more and more pain, until they kept bumping up the pain [medication]. Eventually, she just became less and less coherent.害羞草研究所�

Mallory害羞草研究所檚 death cut a wide circle of grief that includes three young children and a husband trying to cope with his own feelings.

害羞草研究所淲hen the kids have sad days or moments, then I need to try to figure how to talk to them, tell them and reassure them that everything is going to be OK,害羞草研究所� he said. 害羞草研究所淚 mean, I have my own moments too, but I am the only one who can really help that.害羞草研究所�

Stradecke said his children have on balance responded to the death of their mother as well as one might expect.

害羞草研究所淢y four-year-old son Tristan still asks questions sometimes,害羞草研究所� he said. 害羞草研究所淗e knows he can害羞草研究所檛 see Mommy and she isn害羞草研究所檛 going to be back. You can tell it gets to him sometimes. But he does OK for the most part. My oldest daughter, she definitely has her moments. Yesterday was Mother害羞草研究所檚 Day and she had a bit of an off-day yesterday just because of that.害羞草研究所�

Stradecke, for his part, is not afraid to speak about his feelings. 害羞草研究所淚 miss her like crazy,害羞草研究所� he said. 害羞草研究所淎t least I know she doesn害羞草研究所檛 have to suffer through that anymore.害羞草研究所�

This complex, shifting emotional landscape unfolds against the backdrop of economic anxieties. A carpenter by trade, Stradecke has not worked since mid-December 2017 to help care for Mallory, and currently receives income assistance. While his employer has been very generous, Stradecke says it could be a while until he goes back to work.

A GoFundMe campaign , and Lambrick Park Preschool is putting together a barbecue fundraiser at Gyro Park on May 27 for the family.

The absence of a will by Mallory has further complicated economic matters. has raised $16,525. But the unused portions of this fund remain inaccessible, because they rest in an account under Mallory害羞草研究所檚 name, which Stradecke cannot access until a court grants him control of her estate, including her bank accounts.

害羞草研究所淥bviously, that GoFundMe would help a lot right now,害羞草研究所� he said. 害羞草研究所淚t害羞草研究所檚 been difficult, just slowly plugging away, day-by-day, at these things when I have the time. It has been tricky.害羞草研究所�

Stradecke believes that his wife did not write a will because she was not ready to let go.

害羞草研究所淓ven I thought that we might have a little bit more time than we did,害羞草研究所� he said. 害羞草研究所淎fter January, things started to progress very quickly. A lot of it was just a lack of energy and not wanting to give up her responsibilities. I can tell it was really hard on her.害羞草研究所�

Mallory, in other words, might have been in denial about what was happening to her. 害羞草研究所淪he really wasn害羞草研究所檛 ready to let go. She was only 28 years old.害羞草研究所�

While any death raises existential questions, the death of a young woman and mother approaching the prime of her life appears especially harsh and raises the obvious question: why?

害羞草研究所淚 can honestly say, I have asked it, but there is no good answer,害羞草研究所� said Stradecke. 害羞草研究所淭here is no answer. This is life. Good things happen to bad people and bad things happen to good people. I can only hope things happen for a reason. I don害羞草研究所檛 really know.害羞草研究所�

Stradecke, however, does know one thing. He has received immense support from friends and family, and he could not be more grateful for it.

害羞草研究所淚 don害羞草研究所檛 ask anything of anybody, so anytime anybody offers me anything, I am just so very grateful that I am receiving any kind of help.害羞草研究所�

Like us on and follow us on