Natalie White has a wound that will never heal.
Her 19-year-old son was killed in a motorcycle accident two years ago and White says the loss still fills her with a numbing pain that will never go away.
The Langley City mother has been waiting since then to find out the details of what actually happened in the accident.
White害羞草研究所檚 son died June 20, 2018 when his motorcycle collided with an SUV on 181A Street at the 61B Avenue intersection.
But in the ensuing court case, a stay of proceedings was entered and the case never went to trial. With no court hearing, White said, the family was denied closure, with no opportunity to hear the driver害羞草研究所檚 account of the event, and whether he had any regrets to express.
White had always wanted to hear from the other driver, to find out what happened and to help her find some closure.
What White didn害羞草研究所檛 know was the other driver was desperate to find some closure too.
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When White reached out in early June in an effort to contact the other driver, that driver, Johnny Forrest was thankful.
害羞草研究所淲hen I saw that article in the Cloverdale Reporter, it made my day,害羞草研究所� said Forrest, a Cloverdale resident. 害羞草研究所淪he showed compassion toward me. I wanted to find some closure as well.害羞草研究所�
White and Forrest finally got that closure when they met just days before the two-year anniversary of Andrew害羞草研究所檚 death.
害羞草研究所淐an I give you a hug?害羞草研究所� White asked, tears streaming down her cheeks.
害羞草研究所淚 wanted to do this two years ago,害羞草研究所� Forrest replied, as the two embraced. 害羞草研究所淔or me this is closure too. I wanted to show you some compassion and love. I can害羞草研究所檛 thank you enough.害羞草研究所�
Forrest and White met in the common room of White害羞草研究所檚 complex.
害羞草研究所淚 wanted you to know that I don害羞草研究所檛 blame you,害羞草研究所� said White.
害羞草研究所淚害羞草研究所檝e never been the same,害羞草研究所� Forrest said, his thick Scottish accent muffled underneath a facemask. 害羞草研究所淓ver since then, I can害羞草研究所檛 go on that road anymore.害羞草研究所�
Forrest expressed his 害羞草研究所渄eepest regrets害羞草研究所� for what had happened that day and explained to White how he saw the crash unfold.
害羞草研究所淚 was taking my granddaughter home and I was making a left-hand turn,害羞草研究所� remembered Forrest, now 85. 害羞草研究所淚 could see your son coming up the road and I says, 害羞草研究所楤oy! He害羞草研究所檚 a-movin.害羞草研究所� You know?害羞草研究所�
Forrest said he was stopped, waiting for Futerko to pass when Forrest害羞草研究所檚 granddaughter cried out, 害羞草研究所淧apa John, his handlebars are wobbling.害羞草研究所�
That害羞草研究所檚 when Forrest said Futerko害羞草研究所檚 bike changed course and collided head on with Forrest害羞草研究所檚 bumper.
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Forrest said he then did something he shouldn害羞草研究所檛 have. He said his granddaughter was screaming and he had to get her out of there.
害羞草研究所淚 reversed my car, went way back, and then around, and parked my car on the side road,害羞草研究所� he explained.
Forrest said the crash affected his heart and he had to get a heart valve replaced.
害羞草研究所淚害羞草研究所檒l never get over it,害羞草研究所� Forrest added.
The two talked a lot about the facts of the accident. White wondered about all the little details of the collision and everything that led up to it.
She kept wondering what 害羞草研究所� if anything 害羞草研究所� could have gone differently that day, or in those final moments, and changed the outcome of her son害羞草研究所檚 life. What could have prevented him from being on that road at that precise instant? What minor thing could have altered his final moments and given Andrew more time?
害羞草研究所淗e had a lot on his mind that day,害羞草研究所� explained White. 害羞草研究所淗is brain was elsewhere. He was supposed to go to grad that night with a girl and he cancelled on her.害羞草研究所�
White said Andrew had spoken with the girl just before the crash and had told her he would call her when he got home.
害羞草研究所淚 feel like he was probably thinking about that and not paying attention to the road.害羞草研究所�
White said the last two years have been very hard for her. She keeps little reminders of Andrew around because she害羞草研究所檚 scared of losing precious memories. She has a locket with a picture of her and her son and she has his name tattooed on her arm. She害羞草研究所檚 getting another tattoo June 20 of some artwork Andrew made when he was a little boy.
She said she didn害羞草研究所檛 go to the spot where Andrew died until a month after the accident.
White said many have tried to comfort her by telling her it was just an accident. But White said if she views it as an accident, she will just want to assign blame and that will make her angry.
害羞草研究所淚 do believe, 100 per cent, that that was his day,害羞草研究所� said White, choking back tears. 害羞草研究所淭hat害羞草研究所檚 what I have to believe in my heart. Or else, the only other thing is to blame you 害羞草研究所� or him. Or me for allowing him to ride that bike. I didn害羞草研究所檛 want him to ride that thing and I didn害羞草研究所檛 know how to stop him. I beat myself up every day about that.害羞草研究所�
害羞草研究所淭his is how I害羞草研究所檝e gotten my peace,害羞草研究所� White added, eeking out her words through tears. 害羞草研究所淚 wanted to try to share that with you: that was his day.害羞草研究所�
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害羞草研究所淭hat date害羞草研究所檚 gonna be in my head the rest of my life,害羞草研究所� said Forrest. 害羞草研究所淚害羞草研究所檓 like you. I害羞草研究所檓 trying to heal too and get over the shock of it. It was a shock!害羞草研究所� he exclaimed.
害羞草研究所淚 will never be the same person,害羞草研究所� Forrest added. 害羞草研究所淚害羞草研究所檓 trying to heal, but I never will because I was part of that tragic situation.害羞草研究所�
As White and Forrest conversed, they discovered that White害羞草研究所檚 dad grew up in Scotland 害羞草研究所� not far from where Forrest had grown up. (White subsequently passed along Forrest害羞草研究所檚 phone number to her father in Ontario and the two had a long chat about life and Scotland.)
And they talked about Andrew.
害羞草研究所淗e was a funny character. I害羞草研究所檇 love to show you some videos of him, if we can meet again,害羞草研究所� said White. 害羞草研究所淲hen he was happy.害羞草研究所�
White shared that Andrew loved playing video games and he was a big practical joker. She said he played rugby and had gone to Scotland on a rugby tour in his senior year of high school at Lord Tweedsmuir.
害羞草研究所淚 don害羞草研究所檛 think he cared too much about rugby,害羞草研究所� laughed White. 害羞草研究所淚 think he just wanted to go on the trip. (Laughs again). I seriously think that.害羞草研究所�
White told Forrest that Andrew also played rugby because he loved his rugby coach, Tweedsmuir teacher Jamie Overgaard.
害羞草研究所淚f it wasn害羞草研究所檛 for Jamie 害羞草研究所� in high school 害羞草研究所� I don害羞草研究所檛 know what would have become of my son,害羞草研究所� she said. 害羞草研究所淭hat man loved my boy and he gave him love and guidance. And my son was not an easy boy to deal with. He was a hard kid to handle, but he was a good kid. He was different. Jamie took a shine to him.害羞草研究所�
White said Overgaard had the idea to start a fundraiser in Andrew害羞草研究所檚 name. So they started the Esta Bueno Rugby Fundraiser. The fundraiser helps Grade 12 rugby players at Lord Tweedsmuir by offsetting costs for overseas rugby tours. (The third annual event will be held at Cloverdale害羞草研究所檚 Beaver Lodge sometime in the fall.)
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害羞草研究所淎t the first fundraiser, I thanked Jamie for loving my boy and he said that害羞草研究所檚 why he害羞草研究所檚 a teacher, to be there for boys like mine.害羞草研究所�
White said when Andrew was in Grade 11 he also went on a rugby tour to Smith Falls, Ont.
害羞草研究所淢y parents live there and they got to see him play,害羞草研究所� said White. 害羞草研究所淭hey normally wouldn害羞草研究所檛 have been able to see him play.害羞草研究所�
White said Andrew scored the winning try in one of the games and made it into the Smith Falls paper.
White added that it may seem strange, but she thinks there害羞草研究所檚 a reason Andrew died on 181A Street.
害羞草研究所淭hat was Andrew害羞草研究所檚 route 害羞草研究所� obviously he took it that day 害羞草研究所� but he grew up on that street. He walked on that road. He rode a bicycle on that road. He learned to drive on that road. And he died on that road.
害羞草研究所淭hat road has so many memories. I feel like that road was at the heart of who he was.害羞草研究所�
害羞草研究所� with a file from Dan Ferguson.
editor@cloverdalereporter.com
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